This past week has been hell. Too much has happened at work and caused a panic attack. My work had me running around for all sorts of reasons trying to get my squad all setup and to move to the new office. Still getting overwhelmed by the amount of work that I have to do and learn. Though, Friday went well as I was actively pushing myself to make sure stuff got done and then promptly hit a wall. That wall being I found out that most the stuff that I need access to I won’t be getting till next week, that I’m not added to certain channels or tools. Various areas I need to do my work are falling onto others and not me, which has helped tremendously for anxiety.
Speaking of anxiety, even though I was having a hellish week I managed to book an appointment with a psychiatrist for medication management through Spring Health. Which is what I have therapy through, benefit from work. The initial setup for everything went quick as I’m very aware as to what I should be sharing and is most practical for medical professionals to know. We covered everything within 10 minutes and then quickly moved on to why I’m seeking medications. Reason being anxiety and stress from work and socializing being extremely difficult. I was then talked through two medications. Sertraline and Clonidine, starting dosage of 25mg and 0.1mg respectively. Then after 7 days, taking 50mg and 0.2mg, doubling the dose. Taking this amount every day.
The effects are supposed to ramp up to a point and then I guess stagnant at the desired levels. Starting out with a very low dose and then increasing it after a week helps the body adjust to a new norm. What was told to me and available on websites as resources for these is the medications take a week or two to build up in the body for the full desired effects where it’s not negatively affecting you. For example, after I had my initial dose and laid down to relax in bed about one hour later I was struck with feeling a light warm and fuzzy energy flow over me. Anxiety went away, I felt very relaxed as if I could just close my eyes and fall asleep, my mind felt cleared. I will have to check in on those symptoms with my second dose to see if that’s the norm when going to sleep or if it’s just my body adjusting. It’s been noted either through “reliable” sources or anecdotally, commonly people won’t feel the effects in their body’s until after a few days or week. I, however, felt them after they were absorbed that one hour in. I’ve always been acutely aware of how my body feels internally and tend to avoid any changes to that baseline, as they often register as an influence, extreme discomfort, or pain.
So, now that I’m awake and more than 12 hours past my first dose I’m feeling quite good. It’s easier to socialize, my mind is more clear, feeling generally happier, having some difficulty concentrating now and then but that seems to come in waves. There are times where it’s hard to remember something like I’ve been used to remembering, it’s coming more from intuition than visual memory sorting. I’m glad to have gotten this over with finally and do hope that this rounds out more in my body so I can find my new comfy norm.
While researching these two drugs I was met with a whole lot of negative talk about them akin to scare tactics. The Clonidine affects blood pressure which has overlap with things like alcohol and anything else that may affect blood pressure, which is a lot of things. I have to be more vigilant about getting up so suddenly as now there is a higher chance for my body to just give out. Sertraline as an SSRI carries with it the possibility of serotonin syndrome which is extremely bad and terrifying.